It’s the end of the world. At least, that’s what we’ve been told about Tortle names. This is a blog post outlining 13 reasons why naming your tortoise after your favorite movie or TV show could not only be the best thing you do all day but also an important decision for future generations to come.
We’re not talking about common names like Tang or Rocky. We’re talking about naming your tortoise after something iconic and epic, like Sloth from The Goonies or Jake Sully from Avatar: the Last Airbender.
This blog post is a countdown to 13 reasons why Tortle names are the end of the world as we know it. Let’s begin with number 13..
Number One Reason Why Naming Your Tortoise Is Awesome? It’ll Make People Happy! __ Number Two Reason Why Naming Your Tortoise Is Great? You Can Put Any Name You Want In World-Changing Content To Save All Humanity! __ Number Three Reason Why I Named My Turtle ‘Ava’ And Ava Saves All Humanity? It’s The Perfect Name For A Tortoise, And Ava Is My Sister.
Number Four Reason Why I Named My Turtle ‘Ava’ And Ava Saves All Humanity? Most People Wouldn’t Guess That Her Name Means Saviour in Hebrew! __ Number Five Reason Why You Shouldn’t Mess With Your Own Tortle Names: What If They’re Secret Heroes In Training?! __ Number Six Reason You Can Be a Hero Anyway, Even If You Don’t Have Superpowers? Just Call Yourself Batman or Catwoman and Go Around Fighting Crime with the Power of Catsuit Technology! __ Number Seven Result if you Fail to Follow Best Practices for Naming Your Tortles?”we will be on earth without tortles”
Number Eight Reason Why I Named My Turtle ‘Ava’ And Ava Saves All Humanity? One Time, When I Called Her “Kitty,” She Got Really Mad. _ Number Nine Result if you Fail to Follow Best Practices for Naming Your Tortles?”We’re all going to die.” -Tortle Names: End of the World
Number Ten Reason You Shouldn’t Mess With Your Own Tortle Names Is That Ava Can Save YOU! __ Number Eleven Result If You Don’t Name Them Right and They Turn Into Monsters? Just Be Prepared To Fight The Mighty Godzilla as a Tiny Little Crocodile (Or As A Giant Monster Smashing Buildings) __ 12 Final Warning About Tortle Names? You’re Probably Wasting Your Time on Facebook When you Should Be Writing the Next Great Tortle Names Book
Number Ten Reason You Shouldn’t Mess With Your Own Tortle Names Is That Ava Can Save YOU! __ Number Eleven Result If You Don’t Name Them Right and They Turn Into Monsters? Just Be Prepared To Fight The Mighty Godzilla as a Tiny Little Crocodile (Or As A Giant Monster Smashing Buildings) _12 Final Warning About Tortle Names? You’re Probably Wasting Your Time on Facebook When you Should Be Writing the Next Great Tortle Names Book.
That’s it for now,
The journal of a Tortle names Toaster, who lives in the future.
Tortles are one-of-a-kind creatures that live on beaches and have very specific needs: they like to eat sea plants such as seaweed and they need their shells cleaned regularly by humans or other tortles. If you don’t do this for them, it’s likely that your friend will die! In fact, many people think these round little animals with bumpy heads look like toast – hence their name (turtle + toast). And if things couldn’t get any worse for our protagonist..they’ve been marked by The End of Days prophecy! Will he be able to save his friends? Read the book to find out!
In this chapter of the Tortle Names series, Toaster is one week away from his due date and he’s panicking (just a little): It means The End of Days has really happened! His friends are all gone now – they’ve been eaten up by predators. He even sees blood on the beach..or was it just seaweed? Will he be able to save them before The Day comes? Read the book to find out!
This story follows Toaster, who lives in an apocalyptic future where humans have disappeared and sea plants cover everything that once used to be dry land. Part of what makes him so different than other tortles is that he can use tools such as axes for clearing areas or knives for cutting coconuts.
Toaster has a friend in Coconut Bill who also lives on the island, but he’s been acting strange lately and Toaster can’t help but wonder if his friend might be hiding something from him. In this chapter of Tortle Names, we find out that Coconut Bill is keeping an important secret about The End of Days-and it will change everything for both friends!
Along with following Toaster as he navigates through life after The Day began, readers get to meet other tortles like Almondine and Sunshine whose stories are just waiting to unfold..even though they don’t know what fate awaits them either. Will Toaster ever find his long lost owner? Or will he succumb to the horrors of isolation and madness?
In this riveting chapter, readers will finally find out that Coconut Bill has been keeping a secret from Toaster-The End of Days is coming and it’s going to change everything! Along with following Toaster as he navigates through life after The Day began, readers get to meet other tortles like Almondine and Sunshine whose stories are just waiting to unfold..even though they don’t know what fate awaits them either. Will Toaster ever find his long lost owner? Or will he succumb to the horrors of isolation and madness?”
blog post content: ttying coconuts. “Toaster has a friend in Coconut Bill who also lives on the island, but he’s been acting strange lately. What does he know that Toaster doesn’t?”
“Throughout this riveting chapter readers will follow Toaster as he navigates through life after The Day began, meeting other tortles like Almondine and Sunshine whose stories are just waiting to unfold. But with an uncertain future ahead of them-will they succumb to the horrors of isolation and madness? Will Toaster ever find his long lost owner or will he come face to face with Coconut Bill’s dark secret?”
blog post content: ttying coconuts.”Toaster has a friend in Coconut Bill who also lives on the island, but he’s been acting strange lately. What does he know that Toaster doesn’t?” “Throughout this riveting chapter readers
As the episode of Tortle Names unfolds, an important question is raised. What do you call a tortoise who has not been given a name? And what does that animal think about this predicament? The program follows three unnamed turtles – and one named turtle with no friends to play with because he doesn’t have a name – as they navigate their world without names.
The next sentence should start after “An important question was raised” or something similar:
It’s hard for us humans to imagine how we would feel if our names were never mentioned at all; in fact, it might be very difficult even to remember them! In Tortles’ case, being able to keep track of where everyone is becomes nearly impossible when they don’t have names to identify themselves. End of the World: Tortle Names has a subtitle, “13 Reasons Tortle Names is the End of the World as We Know It”. The episode we watched explored how being unnamed in reality would affect tortoises’ lives and what they think about their predicament. There are three turtles without names – two who want their own names and one who doesn’t feel lonely because he’s never had friends with which to play games anyway so it wouldn’t matter if his name were known or not. The following should be bullet points for more easily reading content: Reasons Why Being Named Is Important In Reality- Having difficulty remembering your name can lead to things like forgetting
